Friday, March 30, 2012

Sickies

We've got sickies, again, (sigh...)   Haven't taken any cute pictures lately, because nobody's looking too cute lately, including me.  Lots of stress with my job, and lots of sickness, and I'm not feeling like I'm coping particularly well, with anything, since I've had lots of headaches (which I've never really had before) and I'm more sleep-deprived than usual, for some reason.  Through it all, though, I've felt the Lord's hand on our family, and the pure joy of loving and caring for my munchkins has carried me. 

I usually prefer to keep it light here, and just show pictures on my blog, since that's what I prefer on other people's blogs, but I'd like to take a few moments to follow a few of my deeper musings and ponderings.  I think a lot (of course--who doesn't?) and I'm always following my thoughts down these paths, and winding up, who knows where.  Anyone who knows me knows that, but sometimes these thoughts are of a productive nature, and might be beneficial if I threw them out to the universe.

So, in that vein, I must say that I enjoy these kids so much, more than I ever expected, in completely different ways than I ever expected, and having them has really been more like having triplets than I expected.  I won't go off on that tangent, other than to say that life has been pretty crazy, as it would be for anyone whose family increased by triplets.  So, for those of you considering adopting three children, think of triplets, not of the three children you had in some type of usual birth order. 

Back to my musings:  I was terrified of giving birth to a child with "birth defects" and even though I lost a baby at birth (22 years ago!) and you'd think that having experienced "the worst," that I wouldn't be afraid anymore, it was still terrifying.  I'm a very cautious person, but sometimes, when I have what I consider to be an irrational fear, I try to conquer it by doing, learning or immersing myself in it.  I know I did do this, but at the same time, I know beyond a shadow of a doubt, that God put in me a desire to have these children, and that he told me to go and get them.

It's funny that Down syndrome has become so irrelevant, sometimes, in so many ways, that I forget what a big part of our lives it is, until suddenly I'm reminded of what a big part of our lives it is.  I guess, usually by someone else, for whom Down syndrome isn't a big part of their life.  And, as my husband likes to point out, often what I'm experiencing as "Down syndrome" is actually 4 and 6 years, respectively, of institutionalization.  I guess what I'm trying to say, in a very clumsy way, is that we just experience our kids as themselves, and each of them is such a unique individual, and has their own personality, with quirks, and flaws and strengths.  I'm always noticing that they keep pace with each other developmentally, and even though Little Boy is always behind the girls, he's never really very far behind them.  And neither of the girls gets very far ahead of the other in anything. 

Each of my kids can be adorable, and I mean really adorable-- like melt your heart, but then they can turn around and be completely annoying, like--how do they know that would be so annoying?   I used to say watching my kids (my first bunch) was better than watching TV, and I feel that way again.  I love to see how they move, and their expressions, and listening for any words that I might understand.  I think I analyze this bunch a lot more, looking for their needs, and what do we need to work on?  My big kids say I always ruin everything by pointing out how someone is doing something they hadn't done before, and that shows this developmental area, blah, blah, blah.  So what?  It makes me happy, and they like the attention.  They're not like lab rats, and I cuddle them, and exclaim over them, and best of all, they are thriving!  Little Boy is still tiny, but he's growing, and the girls look long and leggy to me, which is okay.

Surprisingly, I discovered some pictures taken about two weeks ago, that I forgot I had.  Enjoy.  They're from the approximately two weeks we had without sickness.  Oy!
How can you fix someone's hair if you don't hold the rubber band in your mouth?
Preschool time!  Too bad it's boring and no fun to color...

A loving sissy

"It would be funny if you tickled his toes..."

As a boy, he likes to do what the big boys do...

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